A Lesson in Romantics.

This album is an absolute jam. Everything about it is golden. I saw them at my first Warped Tour before this one came out. I don’t think theres anything that you can’t love about them as a group.

If you asked me over the last ten years my views on love I would tell you that ‘only fools fall in love.’ I watched that people around me that were my age telling each person they loved them after a week of knowing each other. I have never been in love. I can’t tell you how you know you’re in love or what love really means. I don’t think that love is like it is in the movies. I watched a lot of eighties movies growing up so I wish I could say it is all geek gets the girl, vice versa. It’s not holding a boom box above your head outside (I personally think that’s a terrible movie) or riding into the sunset on a lawn mower. It shouldn’t be about the grand gestures. I think it should be about challenging each other, supporting each other, and growing together. The silly part of me wants it to be kind of like in the movies, little adventures, left overs in bed, singing and dancing car rides, all the small things. Honestly I think what I expect of it isn’t what will ever happen. I don’t like to constantly go out. I’m perfectly content staying in and cooking being lame and watching the stars. I hate when people agree with you because it’s the easy thing to do.  Part of me loves arguing but if you disagree with me on something stand your ground. It’s okay to disagree. I like seeing different views of things. Half the time I end up agreeing with them. I would probably go insane if someone agreed with me on everything. The big thing I watch with couples my age is that they always have so much jealousy in their relationships. You know that’s something that is bound to happen but theres a significant difference between being jealous and not trusting your other. Sixty seven percent of the time it’s not jealousy it’s that they don’t trust on the other person enough. If I have learned one thing from movies is that a relationship can only take so much doubt before it snaps. Be with the person that you don’t doubt. The person fuels your fire not the one that you have to constantly prove yourself to. I like my space. I don’t want to constantly be with the person. I want to see my friends do things on my own. They have their life and I would have mine but at the end of the day they’re the one you’re with. Love wasn’t something that I thought too much about before this year or relationships in general. Turns out that’s all people want to ask you about once you’re twenty three.. After reading this maybe I’m actually the fool.

I don’t remember the stats correctly from class but it’s something like fifty two percent of children that are born to married couples end up having their parents divorce. I’ve been a lucky one. My parents are still together. I constantly have these nightmares about them divorcing. My mom is probably tired of me checking that everything is okay. They’ve been together this long they’re stuck together. In a way I want to be like them. They managed to deal with raising me which I know wasn’t an easy task. They have their disagreements but still grow together. When I was younger they would tell me that ‘they weren’t arguing but they were discussing’. I’m at the point in my life where I get what they meant by that.

Yesterday when I told Chad he should go to the bar he was saying how all of a sudden he wanted kids. I couldn’t tell if he was serious or not. Is that something I’m suppose to know at this age? I don’t know what I want. I always thought I would just figure that out with the person I marry. When did growing up become to weird and complicated?

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23. Michigan. Hella Lame.

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